The tipping point
Big sigh. I told The Heartbreaker that I have feelings for him and it did not go well. I just couldn’t listen to him talk about the women in his life anymore. It was way too hard and got to the point where it was impossible to hide my feelings anymore. It was the tipping point and no matter which way things went they would never be the same.
Apparently he was completely clueless about how I felt, which I kind of don’t understand. I guess I was better at hiding it than I thought.
I’m not surprised at his reaction. It was pretty much what I expected.
Unfortunately I am not mature enough to really be friends with him right now. I miss our friendship; I miss hearing from him and hanging out but at least there is nothing left to hide. And not being part of each other’s lives anymore kind of makes it easier to accept the end. Maybe that just means my feelings for him weren’t really real — maybe it was just a proximity thing.
Either way, I’d never be good enough for him. If I were on fire from head to toe I would still not be “hot” enough for him. He likes the Barbie girls and I am just a plain Jane.
And, so it goes…
